Sinner
by Angel Ren
Summary: The Host: Two healers were snatched, but only Summer Song/Candy survived. Here's the other healer's story, his thoughts and his motivations to make the ultimate sacrifice for his kind.


I just can't seem to keep my hands off of the keyboard, now can I? Another Host piece (though I've had this one on my hard drive for a while, and just recently dusted it off.), and nearly finished with the next chapter of both Ashes and Cupcakes, for anyone who has been following my Twilight work as well.

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**Sinner**  
By Ren

"That's all for tonight, Dancing Rain," Summer Song said softly. I glanced up to the sweet woman standing in the doorway. She slipped off her white coat and hung it up on the door, leaving her only in her purple scrubs.

I felt a strange tug; the fabric, though not intended to be attractive, was very alluring in the manner than it danced around her curves. What strange emotions; I was still getting used to them, even so long after I took this body.

"Yes, I suppose so," I murmured. I closed the book I had been reading and stood up. Summer Song had disappeared around the corner, and I gathered the half-empty box of No Pain and carried it into the patient-receiving facility. I set a few more bottles on the shelf before slipping out of my own coat.

As I flipped off the light, I felt Summer Song slip her hand into mine. Quietly, we left the facility. When I has first taken this position, and this body, and started working as a healer, I'd found myself reaching for a nonexistent set of keys. Humans were always so keen on locking their doors. They were untrustworthy. Dangerous to each other, even. On occasion, that ghost-like remnant of my form flared to life. As I pulled the door closed behind me, I felt my fingers twitch. I cast one look at the door and shook my head, following Summer Song to the car.

Headlights flooded my vision as another car swerved into the parking lot. I put my hand up to my face to shield my eyes. I heard the car door open, and then a woman's voice that nearly broke my heart.

"My friend is in the back. I don't know what's wrong with him," she said. So helpless, so lost, so frightened. The poor creature needed someone to help her friend. I tossed Summer Song a quick look, and instantly we both moved away from our car and to the girl's van.

I only barely registered as she slipped around to the front, completely distraught. Poor child, something traumatic must have happened to her friend to leave her so upset. Perhaps the desert had been unforgiving, or even a wild human. There had been hushed gossip about wild humans.

There, sitting in the back of the van, was a boy. No, a man. Boy was most definitely not the right word. He sat in the back, his hands in his lap. I felt as if time slowed down. Another young man, slenderer than the first, came around to Summer Song's side.

I barely had time to glance up and look into his deep blue eyes. He was Wild. Summer Song didn't even notice before he had grabbed her from behind. I lurched toward him, trying to free Summer Song as the man put a rag over her face.

Before I could touch her and try and pull her away, a strong arm wrapped around my abdomen, pulling me sharply to one side. Something cool and rough was forced over my mouth and nose, thick and heavy with scent. What violence was this? I looked over my shoulder. It was the man from the back.

He was not at all injured.

He was completely well.

And he was wild, too.

She had lied to us.

One of our own had lied.

I first became aware of voices around me. My head throbbed slightly, as if I had tripped and fallen, bumping my head. It was that feeling right before I applied the No Pain.

"…under the body. Find the line of attachments. They'll feel tight, like wires," a voice was saying. It was a young girl's voice, and it sounded oddly familiar.

Where was Summer Song? Was she alright? Memories of the wild humans attacking floated back to me, and very carefully, I opened my eyes.

I didn't look around, I didn't want to draw attention to myself. I simply stared at the ceiling, completely motionless. It was rocky.

Where was there a rocky ceiling? Was I underground somewhere? The thought sent a shiver of fear down through me. Were the voices to my right humans? I didn't dare look, only listen.

"Give it time to retract. Wait till it rolls up a bit, then take it into your hand."

"Okay."

I frowned; that sounded awfully like…

"Give the soul to Ian. Gently, please."

With encroaching horror, I realized I was right. Not only was I right, but of the most terrible sense.

It wasn't just that the humans were taking souls out. One of _ours_ had betrayed us. I couldn't believe it. I turned my head on the cot to stare at her – the girl that had so earnestly begged for our help in a time of need.

How could something so sweet and soft be so cruel? Was her host stronger than her? Did the human control the body?

Regardless of the means, she had conveyed our deepest and most dangerous secret to those whom we feared knowing. She had told them how to destroy us.

All we wanted was to make a home. Their way of life was so brutal; to each other and to their planet. I watched with strange horror.

Blood had spilled everywhere in the operation. Summer Song was bleeding. Unable to stop myself, I sat upright on the cot, my eyes locked on the girls.

_One of ours!_

She was one of us! With them!

I could feel my heart begin to shatter; those we trusted most sold our secrets sacrilegiously.

"Look out!" I glanced across the room, looking down the barrel of a gun.

Terrible, terrible creatures.

I turned my head back to look at her, completely bewildered. I had to know. I just had to know the answer.

"Chloroform!" Another shout echoed across the room, but she was looking at me. Our eyes met, and it was like time slowed down. There, in her eyes, I saw everything. Her betrayal. Her want. Her need. Her longing. Light glittered off the silver ring in her eyes – not another person in the room had the same ring, we, two, were among our enemies, and yet I stood alone.

She was with them.

"Why," I asked softly. I couldn't fathom the response. I couldn't handle the idea. Summer Song had been tortured and extracted from her shell. And why? Because one of our own had sold our secret.

I shook my head in staggered disbelief, and I watched the wild panic flood into her eyes as she realized what I was going to do: the only thing I could do.

As the room blacked out around me, I heard her scream. Why she would care, I couldn't understand, but I didn't have time to think.

It was over.

Because of her, they had won.

The darkness was comforting. I had never really died before. We were always extracted by Healers – or the appropriate equivalent of on that planet – before our host body died.

If this was truly death, then it wouldn't be so bad. Not nearly as bad as what Summer Song had to endure.

Then the darkness changed. It gradually drifted from darkness toward a soft blue color. Blue was comforting. I liked blue. Readily, I embraced the blue as it surrounded me, and I felt myself slipping away, into the blue, as if it were calling me home. 

_Blue_.

_Blue_.

.

.

.

.

So blue.

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**The irony of it all is this started out as an angst piece. To me, it didn't seem like it ended that way. Maybe I'm just incapable of writing angst. Heh. I guess that's not so bad, we all need more fluff, right? Thanks for reading!**


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